Don't give me no lines and keep your hands to yourself!

The topic of today's rant has more to do with people keeping their assumptions to themselves, but the song came to mind and it seemed to almost fit. I don't know how many of my friends follow the show "The Bachelor". In the past, these shows couldn't hold my attention for more than 10 minutes and would give me hours of complaining about how shallow men and women can be and how unrealistically the media is portraying dating and falling in love. I find myself far more entertained by these guilty indulgences, however, these days, and find that if you view from the right frame of mind, you can learn a lot about life. Tonight America learned that Vienna had indeed won Jake's heart. Poor Poor Vienna. Not a darn soul liked her. I surely didn't. I was with the rest of America rooting for Ali and Gia. Tenley was just a little too sugary fakey goodie two shoes for me. I never got the Fargo-esque baby talk and her too good to be true personna. Vienna made no bones about not being a part of the show to make friends. Lots of people have judged her as fake, lacking in virtue, and a plethera of many other terms of endearment. I don't know Vienna. I'm sure I never will. I DO know, however, that if there's anything the past 6 years have taught me about relationships is that.. well.. it's none of your business. I have been in Vienna's shoes. People who don't make the effort to TRULY get to know me, without hesitation, conjure up a number of assumptions about me. I don't have a sweet sugary glazed coating. My number one goal in life isn't to make best friends with every person I meet. Resultingly, I get a lot of "WHAT does she see in JEN?!?! SHE deserves SO much better!!!" This was an overwhelmingly prevalent theme in my last relationship. Many folks assumed that my ex deserved SO much better than me because my ex was.. well.. sweet. Every day was a hunky dory doo-da one, and every opinion opposite of hers had merit and agreeable content. No one had any visible reason not to like her. They seemed to quickly lose count of reasons not to like me. If you know me at all, it needs not said how that relationship ended. Bet ya didn't see that coming. Matter of fact, if I had a dollar for every time I heard that, I'd be getting married in Cinderella's Castle and honeymooning in Trump Plaza!
Of COURSE you didn't see it coming. MANY learned that everything isn't always just as it seemed. First of all of them being myself! Thank GOD for that lesson! Now that it's all said and done, I'm preparing to marry the love of my life, I've mended fences with the ex, and all is at peace with the world.
So next time you have one of those "what are they thinking?" moments, try to remember that the only relationship you carry the first bit of expertise into is your own. If we spent as much time working on our own relationships as we do prying into others, couple's counselors would be out of business!!
Food for thought! Have a great night!